Monday, March 31, 2014
A Guy is a Guy
Well, yes and no. Let's begin with the "yes" shall we? Eve was literally formed from the rib of her husband. We were fashioned to be the man's help meet. Consequently it's natural for us to long for a man to support and love. So its really okay when your middle gets all tingly and your heart skips a beat. And yes, its alright to admit to yourself that you have feelings for him.
No, it's never alright for us to allow these feelings to control us. When you've already chosen your future children's names and worked out the details of the wedding, and you're not engaged then yes you've gone too far. We ought to guard against too much of a good thing, lest these consuming thoughts detract from our present lives and purpose.
Alright.....now that we're passed that let's talk about how to act around guys in general. Be it your little brother or that very aesthetically pleasing gentleman sitting across from you.
I realize that everywhere we turn we are bombarded with advice on how to win guys. At the checkout line with your eggs and milk or all across the internet we are told we must look "hot". Only follow these three easy steps and guys fall at your feet! Oh, and be sure to buy our mascara and you'll be set! Alright, there are some guys who will find you attractive if you follow Vogue's flirting advice. So how does it work? Well, the jerks and creeps will see you showcasing yourself and know you're easy prey. Honestly, you don't want a boyfriend who will spend a few days with you until moving on to the next naive victim.
Alright, so the ways of the world are out. But what about the too common Christian approach avoid, avoid, avoid? I want to clear the record right here and now, this is NOT the Godly way! We are called to be sisters in Christ to all; we aren't to stare intently at an invisible object whenever they come by. Throwing yourself at a guy is one thing, but avoiding him like the plaque is equally heartless.
So where is the middle ground?
We must treat every young man as a brother in Christ. Whew! It can be a difficult pill to swallow. I know it was for me. After all, it would be more than a little creepy to imagine how married life would be with your brother. Or strategically plotting how to always end up sitting next to him. Consequently, this method leaves out every impurity or coyness in a relationship with a guy. There is only room for love. No, not the gushy, red hearts love. I'm talking about the selfless Mother Teresa sort of love, the type of love you must have for every soul you meet.
So how are we to ever find our Mr. Darcy? Whatever happened to plain, old-fashioned fate? You know, when God has everything under control? If we believe everything the Catholic Church teaches, then we ought to be confident in the gentle wisdom and care of God. So you needn't market yourself and let every guy know how single and desirable you are. Instead strive to grow in virtue. Prepare yourself for the day Mr. Right walks into your life...it might be sooner than you think.